Monday, September 10, 2007

THE CROSS: BEYOND NARCISSISM




9th September 2007 : Pentecost 15 : Year C
9:30am Westfield
Jeremiah 18:1-11 Philemon 1-25 : Luke 14:25-35




Narcissism is a term first used in relation to human thought and behavior by the
Austrian physician and psychiatrist
Sigmund Freud.




Narcissism is a set of character traits concerned with self-admiration, self-centeredness and self-regard. Everyone has some narcissistic traits. However, narcissism can also manifest in an extreme pathological form in some personality disorders such as Narcissistic Personality Disorder wherein the patient overestimates his abilities and has an excessive need for admiration and affirmation. This may be present to such a degree that it severely damages the person's ability to live a productive or happy life because the traits manifest as severe selfishness and disregard for the needs and feelings of others.[†]

That’s a quotation from Wikipedia[‡‡] , the “free online encyclopaedia”, and the reason I’ve begun with the topic of narcissism is because I suspect it’s one of the factors that contribute to my discomfort at this gospel passage.

Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t a confession that I have Narcissistic Personal Disorder. At least, I don’t think I have it! But part of my discomfort here does come from taking this passage at an entirely personal level.

Again, don’t get me wrong. We ARE meant to take this very personally indeed. This IS about the personal cost of following Jesus and Jesus wants us to be absolutely clear about the implications of being one of his followers.

It requires commitment – wholehearted, full-bodied, lifetime commitment. It’s not something we might decide to do as a whim, thinking we’ll just pull out, drift away, fade into the sunset of the next appealing spiritual fancy that comes along.

We know Jesus is serious about this because he uses some pretty uncompromising language, talking for instance about hating our families. As Jesus did earlier in Luke, he boldly assaults one of the foundations of Judaism in telling us to HATE our father, mother, wife, children, brothers, sisters.

These days we might retreat to the perverse comfort of some throwaway line about how “dysfunctional” our family is but back then it was mighty challenging stuff. Because Jesus actually does say HATE. Not “dislike” or “feel mildly ticked-off every now and then” – but HATE.

As in “Nazis hate Jews, among others”. As in “most people who live with the delusion of normality hate paedophiles”. As in that disastrously unchristian Christian web site, “God hates fags”.

It’s a pretty good attention-grabber. …Talk about getting you round the throat in a vice-like grip!

And no, Jesus isn’t advising us to respond literally. But he is making a crucial – pardon the pun – point. He does want us to be clear that becoming one of his followers is the most serious commitment we will ever make and that it lasts a lifetime.

So he’s saying, Be absolutely sure what you’re doing. In the gospel words: “count the cost”. Yes, I AM asking you to choose between family and me; I AM demanding your undivided attention AND commitment; I AM telling you that this isn’t just a pastime, a phase, something to do when you feel bored or terrified or there’s nothing worth watching on the telly.

And all of that fundamentally disturbs the wee narcissist lurking, I suspect, in all of us. It certainly challenges me at two narcissistic levels: first because it demands that I think clearly, concisely and consciously about someone other than moi (despite today’s continuing obsession with the “most important person in the world – [ME]”); and second, because Jesus’ challenge makes me think that “taking up the cross” is something that ONLY affects me.

I’ve begun reading a book by Kent Ira Groff, Active spirituality: a guide for seekers and ministers. In the introduction Groff tells a story about a parishioner and his pastor, both of whom felt spiritual dry. So dry that they were unable to see the possibility of helping each other through that terrifying experience.

Groff makes the comment, sadly but without judgement, that neither was able to bring their burdens to the cross and lay them down for healing.

It got me thinking. It began to remind me of one of the late scenes in the movie Kingdom of heaven, in which the most arrogant of the Crusaders march to their doom. They leave Jerusalem boldly parading what was historically regarded as the True Cross, garishly decorated in plated gold, glinting at the desert sun, the symbol, ultimately of their folly and greed. Cut to the aftermath of the battle and we see the same cross, in the background, surrounded by the dead bodies of its erstwhile defenders, stripped of its finery but still standing – standing in the midst of pain and suffering, human misery piled high around it.

The irony and the paradox of that scene remains. The cross that stands in the midst of pain and suffering – the very symbol in our faith of pain and suffering – is EXACTLY where it should be. It is EXACTLY what it should be – the place where all who suffer come for hope and healing.

And when Jesus tells us to take up the cross he is doing so in the knowledge that if we truly hold HIS cross then those who suffer, those who are lost, the weak, the impoverished, the oppressed – will come to it sooner or later. It is and will continue to be, for them, the hope they need, the hope they crave, the hope for which they might not even know they yearn.

Are we who claim to be Jesus’ followers, cross-carriers, prepared to encounter and assist those kind of people? The lost, the broken, the damaged … Are we prepared to recognise and admit that we ourselves are among them? Are we willing to love the kind of people – society’s flotsam and jetsam – who inhabit places like the caravan park across the road?

Because that is what will happen if we really ARE carrying Jesus’ cross. That is what will happen if we really ARE being Jesus.

So the challenge is only partly about me and my response to the cross and the demands such a personal response might make. It’s also about being prepared to stand in the midst of suffering because THAT is the place where the cross of Jesus stands.

Let’s continue, then, to reflect on these twin challenges. Are we in the Parish of the Holy Spirit, Westfield, prepared to make a wholehearted – body, mind, soul and strength – commitment to Jesus? and are we willing to receive and accept those who come to his cross seeking hope and healing?



Alistair Bain, Priest-in-Charge, Westfield



[†] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_personality_disorder and http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Personality_disorder.
[‡‡] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Main_Page

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